ft. We Are Who We Are & Cranberry Pull-Apart Bread

November 20, 2020 by Sydney Grant

Happy Friday and happy almost Thanksgiving! Whether you’re gearing up for a big Zoom call come Thursday, or taking advantage of not having to deal with your family this year, I hope you have a well-deserved, relaxing holiday. And if you’re planning on traveling, please do so safely and don’t forget your hand sanitizer.

And now for my favorite segment — News That Would Normally Be Surprising But Is Actually Not At All Surprising Because 2020: Rockefeller Center’s yearly Christmas tree made its not-so-grand debut last Sunday, Dolly Parton cured coronavirus, and Santa’s finally gone digital. Does anyone have Ol’ Saint Nick’s email? I need to let him know that I’ll be asking for Michael B. Jordan for Christmas this year.

However you’re planning on spending your weekend, enjoy these quarantivities!

Quarant-streams

‘We Are Who We Are’

Watch this if you loved Call Me By Your Name:

Call Me By Your Name‘s Luca Guadagnino has officially entered the streaming chat. For his new HBO drama, We Are Who We Are, he returns to Italy — except this time, he swaps out the sprawling Perlman summer home for a U.S. Army base. The series centers around a group of teens living on the base, as they navigate relationships with parents, each other, and most importantly, themselves.

If you’re thinking this is giving you major Euphoria vibes, re-think. Guadagnino’s depiction of the fumbles and experimentation associated with adolescence is a far more innocent one than Euphoria‘s. It’s also a more subtle one. This show won’t inspire you to bedazzle your face for a night out, but it also won’t give parents a heart attack, either. It’s a slow-burn, but stick with it for three episodes and I promise you’ll be hooked.

Stream it via HBO Max.

‘The Princess Switch: Switched Again’

Watch this if you’re currently bingeing The Crown:

I bet you thought I was done with the cheesy holiday recs — or at least hoped I was. No, I shall not rest so long as Netflix continues to crank out Christmas content — so basically, never! You’re welcome.

Anyway, the latest installment in Netflix’s attempt to be the new Hallmark Channel, The Princess Switch: Switched Again, arrived yesterday, meaning another movie in which Vanessa Hudgens plays multiple versions of herself. ICYMI, in the first Princess Switch, Vanessa plays “Stacy from Chicago,” a baker with a steamy BFF named Kevin, and Lady Margaret, a duchess from the fictional country of Montenaro. After running into each other at a baking competition in the also-fictional kingdom of Belgravia (because, duh) the two decide to switch places. The details are as unimportant as Vanessa clearly felt practicing her British accent was, but basically, all you need to know is Lady Margaret ends up dating Stacy’s BFF Kevin and Stacy marries a Prince named Edward. (because, again, duh.) TLDR, lots of Vanessas falling in love with lots of handsome men during Christmas.

For the sequel, we travel even deeper into the Hudgens multi-verse, introducing yet ANOTHER Vanessa character, Fiona, who hatches a plan to kidnap Margaret and take her place so she can cut herself a large check and retreat for the rest of her days in Capri. Honestly, not a bad plan. Perhaps Netflix understood that three Hudgens’ were just too much for our poor minds to comprehend and, thankfully, we are able to tell Fiona apart from the rest by her blonde wig that is almost as bad as her also vaguely British accent. Like most Netflix Christmas films, this one won’t be winning any Oscars. But if nothing else, at least you’ll be so busy trying to figure out which Vanessa is which while watching that you may just forget that you’re spending the holidays on your couch watching Netflix, instead of vacationing in Capri.

Stream it via Netflix.

Quarant-reads

‘A Promised Land’ by Barack Obama

Read this if you’re a part of Obama’s book club:

President-elect Joe Biden took Georgia (again) AND Obama’s memoir is out?? Christmas came early this year! The highly anticipated memoir A Promised Land was officially released on Tuesday, and you know I already got my copy. The book begins during his early years and follows him throughout his time spent in the White House, from his mother’s battle with cancer to his greatest successes and failures as president. (His recovery act was a triumph for America’s economy, but he wishes he had been able to do more with immigration reform.) It’s a beast of a book — 768 pages to be exact — but after you’re done reading, you can use it as a weight to get arms like Michelle’s. It’s the gift that keeps on giving!

Purchase now via Amazon.